Okay, so, weight loss blogs are nothing new. I'm not expecting this to become big or anything, but the first time I was successful at losing weight, I blogged, and I miss having somewhere to go to dump my thoughts. I also would like to have a place to go once I've made more progress to see how far I have come. The difference between this time and last time is... this time it will be for good.
Let's start from the beginning.
I started gaining weight in middle school. I'm going to attribute this to being the shy middle child. I've always had social anxiety, but I also always had friends that helped me get over that. But in middle school I discovered the wonders of the internet and really enjoyed meeting new people via chat rooms. I could make tons of friends without the social pressure of talking to them face to face! It was a whole new world for me. That summer I spent almost my whole time sitting at the computer instead of biking around town with my best friend. I also found myself eating a lot while sitting there -- I loved ramen noodles, still do really, it's only a bonus that they're super cheap. I would eat two packages at a time, sometimes several times a day. That's almost 800 calories at one sitting, as a pre-teen kid. Add fast food and other convenience meals from two busy parents, potato chips, candy, whatever else I could get my hands on... I got fat. I cant really attribute it to boredom, I just liked to eat.
Later this turned into emotional eating and binge eating.
Fast forward to high school. My family decided to do a Biggest Loser type weight loss competition... I don't even know if the Biggest Loser was on TV yet, but it was the same idea. I was given the option to join in, my mom helped me pick out a diet plan. I followed it and lost weight. But the plan was constricting and, being an internet kid, I had a wealth of knowledge at my fingertips. I learned about weight loss and the important key that it is mainly calories in vs calories out. I won the weight loss competition and more -- I went from 185lbs to 160lbs. I'd never felt so confident in my life.
I probably bounced around in the 160s my whole high school life. Once out of school and into college I started going up into the 170s, would lose back down to the 160s, and so on. Still not too bad. I think the highest I would get was 175lbs before I'd lose back down... but eventually the 160s evaded me.
About three years ago I started gaining weight rapidly. I'd try to take it off time and time again but I could only stick to a plan for a few days or at max a few weeks before I'd go back to my old eating habits. It was an endless string of 'I'll start tomorrow' and then tomorrow came, I ate well in the morning, then blew it all away in the evening with a huge binge. I think I cried the first time I saw 200lbs on the scale, but I didn't stop there. I got up to 260lbs before I decided to do something about it. Even then I was at 260 for quite some time before I got serious.
Getting serious happened in February 1st, 2016. Yes, that's less than two months ago. I'm not sure what finally clicked to make me finally be able to do it, but I've been doing fantastically since then, steadily losing weight. I've lost 31.8lbs at this point. I still have a lot to lose, I'd like to get back down to 160 lbs -- maybe further, but I'll figure that out once I get there.
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